Today in 3rd hour:
A Jewish student was wearing a shirt that said "We Isreali Hot" today. It was really funny to me.
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Today in 7th hour:
Student: "Ms. Wilson, you wanna hear a joke?"
Me: "Sure."
Student: "Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?"
Me: "Why?"
Student: "In case they get a hole in one! Ya big poop."
I just can't believe he called me a "big poop."
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And one from April 2011:
Wilson humor
[will'-sun hyoo'-mer]
-noun
the quality of being amusing or comical only to Ms. Wilson
"I don't get it. It must be Wilson humor."
Origin: Ms. Wilson's 5th hour
30 April 2012
20 April 2012
This has no title...
Today in 6th hour:
Student: "Hey, Ms. Wilson, I'm gonna go buy a water."
Me: "Excuse me?"
Student: "I'm gonna go buy a water."
Me: "Is that how you ask to leave the classroom?"
Student: "Oh sorry, I'm gonna go buy a water?"
This went on for 5 minutes until he finally asked me correctly. It's Friday.
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Also from 6th hour, but in October 2010:
"My mom said if I play with fire, then I will pee the bed."
Student: "Hey, Ms. Wilson, I'm gonna go buy a water."
Me: "Excuse me?"
Student: "I'm gonna go buy a water."
Me: "Is that how you ask to leave the classroom?"
Student: "Oh sorry, I'm gonna go buy a water?"
This went on for 5 minutes until he finally asked me correctly. It's Friday.
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Also from 6th hour, but in October 2010:
"My mom said if I play with fire, then I will pee the bed."
19 April 2012
Kimball, this one's for you.
Today in 7th hour:
A student was walking out the door.
Student: "Hey, come back here so I can make fun of your cargo pants."
Me: "Uh...says the kid wearing cargo pants..."
Student: "His were different...like not cool..."
Me: "Oh..."
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And now for a blast from the past...
March 2010
Male student (to another male student): "Dude, reading Twilight is like playing with your sister's tampons."
Me: "Um, what?"
Male student: "It's girly...ya know...you know what I mean..."
Me: "No. No, I don't."
A student was walking out the door.
Student: "Hey, come back here so I can make fun of your cargo pants."
Me: "Uh...says the kid wearing cargo pants..."
Student: "His were different...like not cool..."
Me: "Oh..."
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And now for a blast from the past...
March 2010
Male student (to another male student): "Dude, reading Twilight is like playing with your sister's tampons."
Me: "Um, what?"
Male student: "It's girly...ya know...you know what I mean..."
Me: "No. No, I don't."
17 April 2012
I can be quoted, too!
I have no words to introduce what happened today in 6th hour.
Female student: "Ms. Wilson, do you want to hear what I did to my car?"
Male student 1: "Did you sexually harrass it?"
Me: "Uh, what? You guys say the weirdest things at the worst times. Ever."
Male student 2 (to me): "That's almost as bad as the time you told us that we ruin your day...everyday."
Me (to male student 1): "I gotta write that down."
Male student 1: "You can't quote me. I'm not American."
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And a picture for your viewing pleasure:
Female student: "Ms. Wilson, do you want to hear what I did to my car?"
Male student 1: "Did you sexually harrass it?"
Me: "Uh, what? You guys say the weirdest things at the worst times. Ever."
Male student 2 (to me): "That's almost as bad as the time you told us that we ruin your day...everyday."
Me (to male student 1): "I gotta write that down."
Male student 1: "You can't quote me. I'm not American."
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And a picture for your viewing pleasure:
16 April 2012
The Written Word
These are all old quotes. These are few that I came across while grading, notes that were left in my box, or notes I found on the ground.
October 2010
(This is verbatim. I am made sure I didn't make any typos)
Deat Courtney "Hothead" Wilson,
I am honored for being put in your class even though I didn't want. I also am grateful that you make me laugh every morning (especially when I walked in the classroom and saw that you killed Kraken). I really appreciate how you can turn something dull and turn it into something fun. Also, I appreciate the stories. I will continue to use Latin in my everyday life. "Furcifer! Furcifer!" LOL!!!
Sincerely,
Your mystery student
(n.b. My name is not Courtney. No one has ever called me "hothead." Kraken was a fish and I didn't kill it. My third hour did.)
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March 2010
Here is a made-up god from one of my students...verbatim: "The God of Exorcist or A.K.A the god of the Devil Zilla...was one of the most deadliest and the most unappropriete Devil person in this world of life. His hobbys included possessing human life, making different style of laughs, and having a rated "R" moment. His mind can go from normal to strange, he burns people day and night."
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April 2011
Extra credit question on a Latin I test: "Who said veni, vidi, vici?"
One student's answer: "Hitler"
October 2010
(This is verbatim. I am made sure I didn't make any typos)
Deat Courtney "Hothead" Wilson,
I am honored for being put in your class even though I didn't want. I also am grateful that you make me laugh every morning (especially when I walked in the classroom and saw that you killed Kraken). I really appreciate how you can turn something dull and turn it into something fun. Also, I appreciate the stories. I will continue to use Latin in my everyday life. "Furcifer! Furcifer!" LOL!!!
Sincerely,
Your mystery student
(n.b. My name is not Courtney. No one has ever called me "hothead." Kraken was a fish and I didn't kill it. My third hour did.)
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March 2010
Here is a made-up god from one of my students...verbatim: "The God of Exorcist or A.K.A the god of the Devil Zilla...was one of the most deadliest and the most unappropriete Devil person in this world of life. His hobbys included possessing human life, making different style of laughs, and having a rated "R" moment. His mind can go from normal to strange, he burns people day and night."
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April 2011
Extra credit question on a Latin I test: "Who said veni, vidi, vici?"
One student's answer: "Hitler"
11 April 2012
You learn something new every day...
Today in 2nd hour, I heard some students talking about "coning." Being ignorant of said activity, I decided to ask what "coning" is.
Student: "It's when you order an ice cream cone in a drive thru, drive up, take the ice cream scoop off with your hand and then drive off leaving them with cone. It's so funny."
Me: "So, after all is said and done, you're a few bucks poorer, you have no ice cream cone, and your hand is sticky. Wow, you really pulled one over on the ol' drive thru worker, didn't you?"
Student: "It's when you order an ice cream cone in a drive thru, drive up, take the ice cream scoop off with your hand and then drive off leaving them with cone. It's so funny."
Me: "So, after all is said and done, you're a few bucks poorer, you have no ice cream cone, and your hand is sticky. Wow, you really pulled one over on the ol' drive thru worker, didn't you?"
10 April 2012
And here we go...
These quotes are brand new from today. Now that my students know I have a blog for their quotes (it was still quite a big deal to them to "make Facebook" as they said), they are trying to prattle off funny quotes left and right. For example:
All three of these came from 7th hour.
Student: "SON OF A NUTCRACKER!"
Me: (I turn my head to find the student staring at me in a peculiar way) "You're trying to get on my blog, aren't you?"
Student: "Yes."
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Same male student from above: "Ms. Wilson, I'm pregnant!"
Me: "Dude, you're trying to get on the blog. That wasn't even funny. Quit trying so hard."
Student: "Dangit."
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This one actually wasn't on purpose.
I noticed a student had out a tablet and was playing a game.
Me: "Um, excuse me, what are you doing?"
Student: "I'm shining poop."
Me: "Ok..."
I have a feeling I'm going to have to sift through really forced comments now that they know I have a blog. That's OK. It's entertaining.
All three of these came from 7th hour.
Student: "SON OF A NUTCRACKER!"
Me: (I turn my head to find the student staring at me in a peculiar way) "You're trying to get on my blog, aren't you?"
Student: "Yes."
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Same male student from above: "Ms. Wilson, I'm pregnant!"
Me: "Dude, you're trying to get on the blog. That wasn't even funny. Quit trying so hard."
Student: "Dangit."
-----------------------------------
This one actually wasn't on purpose.
I noticed a student had out a tablet and was playing a game.
Me: "Um, excuse me, what are you doing?"
Student: "I'm shining poop."
Me: "Ok..."
I have a feeling I'm going to have to sift through really forced comments now that they know I have a blog. That's OK. It's entertaining.
The Creativity of Creative Writing students
These previous posts come from my Creative Writing class that I taught for one semester. I don't normally teach Creative Writing. It was definitely an interesting and entertaining experience.
December 2010
Here is a limerick from one of my students:
There once was a bro named Chelsey
She thought she was cool with Kelsey
But Kelsey stole her shoes
So Chelsey killed her with guns
And then China took over the world and everyone died in nuclear warefare and the leftovers survived in a post-apocalyptic world but they became mutated freaks and they eventually died off, ending the human race forever.
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October 2010
"I'm older than the refigerator...BOOM! When I'm older, I'm going to join the mafia and say "BOOM" after everything."
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September 2010
OK, so I'm in my Creative Writing class and none of my students have spoken a word since the class started. They say (write) that it's the "National Day of Silence for Womyn's (spelled so to take the "man" out of "woman") Empowerment." It's not really. They just got in a circle and hugged and now one of them is making a sword out of foil.
(Side note: He also made a crown out of foil and paperclips.)
December 2010
Here is a limerick from one of my students:
There once was a bro named Chelsey
She thought she was cool with Kelsey
But Kelsey stole her shoes
So Chelsey killed her with guns
And then China took over the world and everyone died in nuclear warefare and the leftovers survived in a post-apocalyptic world but they became mutated freaks and they eventually died off, ending the human race forever.
--------------------------------------------------
October 2010
"I'm older than the refigerator...BOOM! When I'm older, I'm going to join the mafia and say "BOOM" after everything."
--------------------------------------------------
September 2010
OK, so I'm in my Creative Writing class and none of my students have spoken a word since the class started. They say (write) that it's the "National Day of Silence for Womyn's (spelled so to take the "man" out of "woman") Empowerment." It's not really. They just got in a circle and hugged and now one of them is making a sword out of foil.
(Side note: He also made a crown out of foil and paperclips.)
09 April 2012
Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears...
Welcome! I have decided to move all of my student quotes from Facebook to a blog so everyone can enjoy! I will add new ones as I get them, of course, but I'm also going to transfer the ones currently on Facebook from throughout the years over. It's a long process so you will have already read some of them. But they're funny as crap so get over it. We'll start with one of my favorites (these are coming directly from Facebook)...
May 2011
Ahh, Teacher Appreciation Week. Here is one note I received:
"I am thankful to my (school name) teacher Ms. Wilson because she is a super cool dude, and doesn't afraid of anything."
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March 2011
So, I'm grading quizzes right now and one of my students didn't know an answer so she put this:
"Guess what? I just laid a big one and it was silent."
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March 2010
Today in 2nd hour: "You're not the Ms. Wilson you used to be."
This was said because I wouldn't let one of them go outside with a pair of scissors and "test something."
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This should be good to get everyone started. I'm going to try to spread them out so I can post throughout the summer for your reading pleasure. Thank you for tuning in.
May 2011
Ahh, Teacher Appreciation Week. Here is one note I received:
"I am thankful to my (school name) teacher Ms. Wilson because she is a super cool dude, and doesn't afraid of anything."
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March 2011
So, I'm grading quizzes right now and one of my students didn't know an answer so she put this:
"Guess what? I just laid a big one and it was silent."
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March 2010
Today in 2nd hour: "You're not the Ms. Wilson you used to be."
This was said because I wouldn't let one of them go outside with a pair of scissors and "test something."
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This should be good to get everyone started. I'm going to try to spread them out so I can post throughout the summer for your reading pleasure. Thank you for tuning in.
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